Thoughts...

Why do you go to church?
Is it just to soothe your conscience?
Is it because you've been goin all your life?
You once told me that you wish to set an example
So if i was to follow, is this what i should do?
Should i drink a few, listen to filth too?
"Watch me, the beginning of the year, i'm gonna be on fire for God"
Words you never meant instead you actions are a spit at God
I mean i know we've heard that people sayin they've gone too far
So are you trying to go further so you too can be "too far"
I don't mean to judge cause i'm not perfect either
I'm probably just the same probably not clean either
But i'd rather say what i see and not hide it within
Because right now i feel i'd rather have you dead that watch the way you're living
I shouldn't feel that way i know but there's the thought
It's better to know you're not here than have you here and lose you there
The worst thing right now is that you'll never read this
Because talking to you, my words would just be like a mist
Hovering but with no effect and you go away unchanged
So all i can do now is get on my knees and have my faith engaged
I feel like i myself am not worthy to pray conviction to you
Because i feel i better get myself together first, get a better view
But all the same i can't help it, the thought of you makes me cry
And sometimes i just sit and remenice, wondering Lord why
I don't wanna hate you, i can't, probably never can
But i'm finding it hard to respect you, though i used to be your fan
This is all i can write for the person i do not wish to see
The one close to me, once my best friend whom i wish to be the person they used to be

© Charity E Tafirenyika @